Baby steps

I couldn’t.
I couldn’t do it.
It took me 30 extra minutes to get out of bed; 30 minutes staring at the shower before I broke down into tears.

I even had my husband make my lunch.
But I just couldn’t do it.
I ran to him and just cried in his arms. I still have no idea why I was crying. And why I’m crying right now.

I have to know my limitations with this disease – something I didn’t know in college (at least wouldn’t admit). I cannot help others when I’m knee deep in crying spells, low motivation, low ADLs (activities of daily living), and general sadness. I cancelled my appointments for the day, called my psychiatrist, and am going back to sleep.

Today may not feel like a win, but I didn’t lose.

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