I see you’ve met her. She was here only a minute ago per my husband.
Yelling at the television. Yelling at him; yelling at Mom. Laughing, yelling “nonsense.”
You see, if she took the time – if I took the time to explain why
she I was yelling in the first place, maybe this wouldn’t be a problem.
I still feel like my emotions aren’t regulated. Since I’ve stopped hurting myself, I still find it hard to express my feelings aloud. When I do, I still don’t feel like I’ve done them justice – like there’s more in there.
All I want to do is crawl into a ball until New Year.